t h o u g h t . b u b b l e s

Today is a repeat of a day in around September, almost three years ago. I woke up and felt the exact same as I did on that fall day. I would never wish that upon anyone.

So, this post will be about anything, and everything that runs through my mind. I need to write... and the quickness of the keys sound more pleasant than writing on paper would be.

Let's talk about World Lit class. This is a class that I've skipped... about 3 times in a row. Grade A student, lemme tell ya. I never do the reading assignments and we always have what he likes to call, 'go arounds'... these go arounds consist of questions that normally I wouldnt have a CLUE as to what the answer was... But I sit somewhere in the middle of the class so I gain an answer by the time it gets to me. Anyway, my mind was wandering as always... and I started to think about the diversity of people in that class. I am a people-watcher for sure if nothing else.

the guy who always comes in late, wears a leather jacket and has an unruuuuly beard. i mean its outta control. the sweet girl who never looks up from her book when she's asked a question. then there's the guy that sits in the front row, who is the only person who answers when the teach asks a question. except sometimes the dude sitting beside of me pipes up and actually has some wise insight. then there's the man that sits besides me who, no joke, is identical to morgan freeman. i wish i could take a picture and post it.. it's creepy how much they look alike. and the quiet girl who sits on the other side of him, who has good conversation with him in the few minutes before class starts. then there's the woman... who has beautiful red hair, who has souch a slow southern draw, thinks its completely and absolutely eve's fault that adam ate the apple. she is my favorite. then there's the teach; northern, independent as hell, doesn't like to be bothered by his wife to get a loaf of bread when he's fly fishing for God's sakes.

We were asked today, on our daily 'go around'... if we would like to just live in the mtns, get away from society. Yes please?! Where do I sign up?? I was surprised at some people's answers... saying no because they would miss their cell phones. sheesh. I wanna live in the mtns, learn to play the banjo, sing my heart out to God all day, everyday... that seems perfect to me. Sure, it'd be a challenge. Who doesn't like a challenge? According to the guy who broke his ankle snowboarding, he's up for the challenge too.

Then we started talking about Chinese culture... and how 'turtle-head' is like the ULTIMATE insult. TURTLE-HEAD?! thats hilarious. 'God, you're SUCH a turtle-head! Stop being a turtle-head...' hahahah I love it. I remember when Kaylie, Zac and I 'turtle-headed' Marcos at the gas station! hahahah it was SO funny. Oh, to go back to that night.
p.s. 'turtle-headed' means just up and leavin someone somewhere. Youre like 'nah... i'll just stay in the car, grab me a water while you're at it'
then... BAM. they walk out and they have no idea where their ride is.
It's only mean if you don't return to pick them up. :)

God, I need a pink and purple sunset today... or sometime soon... Please do that for me.

I have to keep talking... if I don't talk, I think. I don't wanna think right now...not yet. I'll hide a little longer in this blog post.

Lastnight was the first time I had a real, intimate, personal conversation with my father. I regret that I have not included him on more aspects of my life. He was more honest with me than ANYONE has ever been before. He spoke from the places that he has hidden from me, from everyone, for so long. He cried, I cried... It was beautiful. Ive never had a conversation so real. I hope that he knows I appreciate everything he does for me. I couldn't ask for a better hard-working, providing, rock of a dad. I want my husband to be everything that he is, nothing less.

My mother, ohh my mother. I love you. I know you're reading this... and you're probably sick at your stomach from that last paragraph. You are crazy. I love that I have your stories and your examples to learn from and grow into a woman from. I miss you... I hope to God that I can come see you and Shawn-Michael soon. He is my escape and I want nothing more than to swing him on a swingset right this very moment. I would be completely happy, with nothing to think about but how blessed I am.

Can someone tell me WHY every damn guy thats tall, that has long hair, thats slighty dark skinned, has beautiful hands?!
What was God thinking when he made that breed? Really?? God, why would you do that to a girl?! There is a dude in the comp lab right now with all of these features and it is making me sick to my stomach.

I'm going to the dam after school today. I need to get my thoughts gathered, and straightened out... and honestly, I just need to sit in God's beauty. I think the dam is one of the best ways Tennessee represents its and God's beauty. My heart is very, very shaky today. I just hope I don't have to go back to the doctor.

Well, this is all I've got for now. I'll be writing tons more considering myspace and I are taking a break.

Good day.